Save The Last Dance For Me

ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  And suddenly it was like everything around us came to a halt. Like nothing else mattered except for the two of us. I watched him as he crossed the room making his way to me. I didnโ€™t think it would happen again after all these years. But it did.

ย  ย  ย  ย  ย  I’ve spent all those years without him or with less of him thinking that what happened then was just us being young. Being caught with everyone in high school. And almost told myself that what I felt then was imaginary. That I imagined it all and it was not real. I thought I’ve moved on from it all but just feeling that gut feeling again even without seeing him made all the memories flood back. I suddenly felt every emotion we had back then. Love, hurt, happiness, sadness, longing…everything. And just catching a whiff of his smell again after how long felt so good. It is still the same scent of him that I knew before when we were young.

ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  He held out his hand and looked at me with that remarkable smile of him that was only for me, as I recall him saying. Then he looked at me straight in the eye asking that one question he asked a long time ago. And just like before, he looked past my eyes and deep into my soul.

Strangers, again

I miss you. Every day. Not a day have passed when I haven’t thought of you. How are you? What are you doing? Are you still the same guy I’ve known before? Do you ever miss me? Or do you even thought of me once after graduation? All those thoughts always run in my head. And sadly, I can’t have the answer to even just one of them.

At first, I tried to understand that we were the kind of friends who prefer talking personally and not virtually. We never lasted a conversation online or through text but we always have the best conversations when we are together. And I have it proven, or I think I did, when we saw each other again at the graduation of the batch after us. I wasn’t even gonna go talk to you because I don’t know if you’d want to or what, but you were the one who called me and welcomed we with open arms. That felt so good. It made me feel still special. Like you never changed at all. Like we never even been apart for a year.

And so I concluded that we’re really just like that. But now, all I know is that I’m confused. You always left me hanging in the air, or maybe I just had myself hanging. I was trying to go on with life as normal. I’d think of you every now and then, but it didn’t hurt that much. Or so I thought.

Up until a friend’s birthday, where I met a mutual friend. You were our common ground so it would be normal that he’d open up a topic about you. I can’t remember the whole conversation but the one thing that stuck to my mind was when he said that you found a new friend from the uni you go to and that you said she was just like me. I don’t know if I’ll believe that or not, ’cause I’ve had my dose of hearing “what you said” about me from other people and not from you. And even if I believe it, I don’t know whether to feel happy that somehow you still recognize me in other people or be sad that you’ve moved on from me and found a new “me” instead.

I don’t want to be strangers again. But I don’t know what life we’ll bring. And maybe we, especially me, just have to accept that people come and go. Some stay and some leave. But I know myself that I won’t ever, ever forget you and that special friendship that we had. Never.

“I think, that if life separates us, and we end up in totally different places, I’ll always remember… and I’ll be thankful for that. And hope that wherever you are, you’ll be thankful too. And I think that’s the best we can wish for.” – Josh (Philip Wang, Wong Fu Productions), Strangers, again

I miss you…



Amazing ‘di ba?


Ang sarap isipin na may isang taong nagmamahal sa’tin. Mas masarap pa nga sa pakiramdam pag nalaman mong marami pala sila at hindi lang iisa. Masayang malamang importante ka sa mga kaibigan mo na inaakala mong walang pakialam sa’yo. Masaya malaman na pag sinabi mong uuwi ka na sa bahay, excited na excited na sila. Masayang malaman na mahal ka ng kapatid mo na dati-rati lang ay isa sa mga laging nagiging dahilan ng sama ng loob mo. Masaya rin sa pakiramdam na pagkatapos kang sermonan ng bonggang-bongga ng nanay mo malalaman at maririnig mo sa kanya na nag-aalala lang siya para sa’yo kasi malayo ka sa kanila at mag-isa ka. Na nagkakaganun siya kasi wala siya sa tabi mo para maprotektahan ka sa aksidente o sakit, physically at emotionally, na pwede mong maramdaman. Masarap malaman na kahit sobra mo na nadurog ang puso ng tatay mo, para sa kanya, ikaw pa rin ang baby at prinsesa niya. Masarap din malaman na pagkatapos ng lahat kasalanan, pagkukulang at sama ng loob na idinulot mo sa mga pamilya mo, nagagawa ka pa rin nila patawarin.

Grabe ang sarap ng ganun no? Pero alam mo ba kung anong pinakamasarap at pinakamasaya sa lahat? Ang malamang mahal ka Niya. ‘Wag ka mag-alala, di ito religious. Totoo naman kasi. Religious ba ang magkaroon ng relationship with God? Hindi ah. Pero balik na tayo sa main point ko.

Nung nalaman kong mahal na mahal Niya ako, grabe lang ang sayang nadama ko. Nag-uumapaw. Naiiyak ako na natutuwa. Minsan bigla na lang ako iiyak out of the blue. Ikaw ba naman kasi hindi maiyak pag nalaman mong mahal ka ng Diyos na siyang lumikha ng lahat. Tapos malalaman mo pang kaya Niya ginawa ang buong mundo at universe ay para sa’yo. Kaya Niya ginawa ang mga napakagagandang bituin ay para may makita kang maganda sa kalangitan pag gabi. Kaya may araw sa langit para mabigyan ka ng init at liwanag. Na kaya may mga puno, halaman at hayop sa mundo ay para meron kang kainin. Na kaya Siya gumawa ng tubig para lang may mainom at mapaliguan ka. Na ginawa Niya ang lahat ng iyon bago pa Niya tayo gawin.

Siguro iisipin mo, bakit Niya tayo ihinuli? Baka di Niya tayo talaga mahal. Biruin mo ihinuli Niya tayo. Diyan ka nagkakamali. Ginawa Niya muna ang lahat ng iyon kasi gusto Niya na pag ginawa na Niya tayo, puro kagandahan na agad ang makita natin. Ganun tayo ka-ispesyal at importante sa Kanya. At nung nagkasala na tayong lahat at nalayo na tayo sa Kanya, ipinadala Niya nag-iisang anak Niya na wala namang kasalanan para lang magbayad sa mga kasalanan natin. At isipin mo pa, kahit araw-araw pa tayo may pagkukulang sa Kanya, hindi Niya ipinagkakait mga pangangailangan natin. Minsan pinaghihintay pa Niya tayo bago natin makuha yug hinihingi natin kasi gusto Niya tamang-tama ang timing ng pagbigay Niya. Minsan hinahayaan Niyang magdoubt tayo sa Kanya para lang magsaliksik tayo tungkol sa Kanya at malaman pa natin lalo kung gaano Niya tayo kamahal. Binigyan Niya pa tayo ng kalayaan. Gusto Niya kasi tayo ang mamili sa mga bagay-bagay na gusto natin at hindi Siya. Kahit mismong ang desisyong mahalin Siya, ibinigay na Niya sa’tin. Kahit hindi Siya ang piliin natin, hindi pa rin nagbabago pagmamahal Niya sa akin. Naghihintay lang Siya lagi. Naghihintay para sa’yo.

Hindi ko naman ginawa tong post na ito para ma-convince ka or whatsoever. Actually, may gusto lang rin kasi Siya ipasabi sa’yo. MAHAL KA NIYA. Baka daw kasi nakakalimutan mo na. ๐Ÿ™‚